Is She Gonna Dougie?

 Last Friday night the family (Dave, David and I) decided to venture off to the land of consumerism and tantrums...Target. Sure we usually save Target for "Sunday FUN-day" but any day is a good day for savings right? What family can resist a place that you can get groceries, electronics, and a dress designed by Jason Wu? 

Well Puss In Boots was coming out on DVD, so there we were on a Friday night. Deciding that we were going to build a fort, order in, and watch the movie... & we allowed David to get these foam swords he was eyeing! I had promised David for being such a good boy at the dentist earlier in the afternoon, he could get a prize! He chose swords because he knows Puss In Boots fights with them...because we saw it twice in IMAX and now we are going to own it...because movies really are better the thirtieth time aren't they!? 

In the midst of all the excitement-David had taken the swords out and ripped off the tags. Well a good parent would take the toy and put it back on the shelf, a GREAT parent would put Puss In Boots back and leave the store. Well, as much as I would consider myself having a lot of good parenting qualities, considering myself a disciplinarian is somewhat laughable! A little bit of it is I don't want him to be mad at me. Some of it is I'm having fun too! I don't want to put the movie back. Who am I kidding I've only seen it twice! If I have to watch CARS again I will have a nervous breakdown!!

I get to thinking how do I fix this? How do I teach him a lesson without ruining our Friday night....and then it came to me. With Dave going along with it, we decided to tell David he could only get the swords if he walked up to the sales person, apologized, and begged for her to still let him buy them. If not he would be leaving without them and THAT I could live with!!

 So he looked at us and looked at her and we shoved him along- and God love him he walked up to the sales girl, who had to be a little shy of 17- and he shook and teared up and with a little voice muttered out "I'm so sorry can...I...buy, these?" She laughed and looked at us (which I'm still not positively sure she wasn't judging us) but she scanned the swords and we patted ourselves on the back for good parenting. 

On the way home I told Dave we may be on to something! Embarrassment as a means of discipline? Okay so stay with me...I said before I am not a good  disciplinarian but EMBARRASSMENT that comes pretty naturally too me! When he went up to that sales girl he wasn't scared he was beat red! He...was....embarrassed. But what if it didn't end there...the possibilities are endless.

Of course these would all be tailored to age...embarrassment is subject to your maturity. But for example if he won't get changed in the morning, FINE no problem, I'll go drop you off  at school without any shoes on MY feet. I'll go barefoot...that will save time!

When he's a little older and thinks he can disrespect me in front of his friends I'll just hook up the karaoke machine and have a little Aretha Franklin concert in our living room 

"R-E-S-P-E-C-T...David what's it mean to me"?

Won't turn off the TV/COMPUTER/I PAD,,,etc. to do your homework? That's cool, I'm just gonna sit right down next to you and have a  FART-A-THON.

If I see you when your older skipping school, loitering, or not being a stand up citizen in any way. I'll stop my car in traffic, get out and do the "Dougie" in front of all of your friends. At a certain point I won't have to do any of this though! That's the beauty because it will become like psychological warfare-I'll break him down so badly that I will just have to give a look, and he will be terrified, because he doesn't know what I'll do next! Voila! It could be messed up or pure genius. I don't know yet?

But someday when David is a senior in high school and he's working on a Friday night instead of hanging at whatever local wooded area the kids are drinking at. It's gonna be because I showed up in mini-skirt and  a Mojito...."Hey David come muddle this for your Mother"